Building Faith at Home: Practical Tips for Parents of Little Ones with Nancy Boyer

DJ Stutz  00:14

You're listening to Imperfect Heroes: Insights into Parenting, the perfect podcast for imperfect parents looking to find joy in their experience of raising children in an imperfect world, and I'm your host, DJ Stutz, Welcome everybody, and thank you for choosing to spend the next few minutes here with us at Imperfect Heroes: Insights into Parenting. And have you ever wondered about what the role of faith is in your family? How does that work with your parenting. What are you teaching your kids, and how does that manage the boundaries and the values that you are setting forth with your kiddos? Well, today we are talking all about that with my friend Nancy Boyer. Before we get started, I just want to let you all know that today, this episode is my season finale for season five, and we're gonna take a little bit of hiatus. It's the first time I've done this in five years, but I'm gonna do a little bit of living what I preach, and I'm going to spend the summer time with my family, with my 13 grandkids, and doing some fun things that I need to do. So we will start up again once the school season starts. So in August, we'll be up and running again. So thank you for all of your efforts in sticking with us and making this podcast so fun. And you know, if you're missing me, because I don't blame you. I would miss me too. And so if you are missing me and want to hear my voice, this is episode 201.  Plenty of episodes for you to go back and look and see some of the amazing topics and guests that we have had over the last five years. Another way that you can get in with me is, of course, the books right, Amazon, Barnes and Noble, Walmart, bunch of other websites that sell books. They're there. Just look for DJ Stutz. You'll find all of my books. Book four is in the work, so we'll be moving on with that. It'll probably be ready next fall. So we're gonna have a lot of fun with that. All right, let's get going. Nancy Boyer.  Nancy is the mother of five. Whoop!  Got to love those mothers of five, and she's a budding author working on her own little books about celebrating holidays in a faith filled way. We'll talk a little bit about that. She got her degree in Family Science from BYU. She was a high school teacher for five years, teaching about family skills, which is great. High schools really need that stuff. She also worked with foster care in when she was in Utah, helping moms who were in danger of losing custody of their kids, helping them understand what they needed to do to keep their family together. Oh my gosh, talk about the work of angels. Is that not something super, super special. She is a resident of Las Vegas. Y'all will remember I was in Vegas for 20 years myself. That's where my kids were mostly raised. And she also has been dealing with a sick kiddo today, and she still showed up for all of this. So you know, if you hear a little noise in the background, that's just her doing what moms do. And so I appreciate that. Nancy, thank you so much for joining us.

 Nancy Boyer  03:52

Well, thank you for having me DJ. This is a fun opportunity for me.

 DJ Stutz  03:57

It is fun. I love what I do. I truly, truly do. So let's go ahead and let's get started on talking about our kiddos and the decisions that we make when they're little. For me, faith based decisions started happening even before they were born, in the way I was raised and how I chose my husband and the way that we move forward. You know, Faith played a big part of that, and then the kids came, so we already had that foundation of faith. Some families are like that, and faith has just been a part of their lives. Other families, the faith piece is kind of new to them, or maybe they've changed faiths throughout the years. And how does all of that work? I'd love to hear your story. I know that you've been married about what 21 years. You said.

 Nancy Boyer  04:44

Yeah, 21 going on 22 and yeah. What's kind of unique about us is that my parents passed away into well, I'll quickly summarize here my story when I was. Young, about four, my parents got divorced, both remarried. I lived with my mom and my stepdad, and then when I was 16, my mom was eight months pregnant, and she and the baby died in a car accident at at age 16. Gosh, yeah, and, and it was one of those where I had to choose, do I believe? Do I How am I going to get through my life? And I had had some previous experiences where I knew that I needed to have faith, that that was going to get me through my life without even knowing what would would come up. And so I just knew I chose faith. And then when I was 18, my dad, my real dad, was in a car accident and also died. And... yeah, and so faith has been the only way through my life, the the times that maybe I've thought, oh, okay, God is mean, that's when I not happy. But my whole life, whenever I've just held on to the fact that we have higher power. And some, some believe it as higher power or the universe. And for me, it's, it's God, and that has gotten me through. And my husband actually his mom when he was five years old, was diagnosed with breast cancer, and he just lived with his mom with this disease until he was 21 he went on a mission for a couple years, and when he came back four months later, his mom passed away, and so our children, three of their four grandparents, have been in heaven, and So we've had talked a lot about faith has been such an important foundation for us, because I had the best grandmas and I loved them, and my kids haven't gotten that, and so we've had to talk about things in different ways that they still receive love from the other side, From angelic grandmas and grandpas and from God that that really we've had to turn our lives over to just saying, you know what we believe, and we will just have that as a foundation for our family, because that's the only still been the only way through.

 DJ Stutz  05:49

Holy cow,  So, that is amazing. I love what you said about angelic grandparents, so that even though those grandparents weren't there to come to their recitals and cheer at their baseball games, but that they So,were still there to bring love, and the kids could feel that and talk about grandparents and hear those stories about who they came from, and the role that God played in all of that. I love that you brought that in.

 Nancy Boyer  07:44

Yeah.  In fact, my twins, I have twins who are now 15, and when they were born, they were in the NICU, and that was a crazy time. I had a five year old and a three year old, and then they were in the NICU, and we didn't have grandmas to come help. Everybody has their moms come help after they have a baby. All my friends had that, but that was not the case for us, and I prayed hard. But you know what? I after those twins, I just I was able to sleep. Somehow, heaven just came in. And after that, I have no doubt that just that decision to believe in angels and to believe in that power from God, it is real. I felt it with four little kids at that age. There's no moms to help out. There is no way that I would have gotten through without no

 DJ Stutz  08:38

I can't even imagine it. I mean, I didn't have twins. I have twin brothers. 

 Nancy Boyer  08:42

So you know what it's like. 

 DJ Stutz  08:44

I know what it's like. In fact, they were numbers five and six in our lineup. So I'm the oldest of seven. So I was 10 when they were born, and I was old enough to kind of help out. We lived away, though, from the rest of our family, all of our family, both sides, were in Oregon, and my dad was a professor at UCLA, so we were in LA and so we had my grandma, Banyan, my dad's mom, she came for a while, and then my mom's mom came for a while. And we had so many people who were from church, you know, at the time. I mean, yeah, this is a long time ago, right? And the twins were born in the 60s, and my mom didn't have a dryer. She was still hanging clothes up on clothesline. And I remember our church, the women in the church realized, like, this makes six kids she's gonna need, and she didn't know she was having twins. Well, that's a whole story. That's a whole story. She was ginormous. They were 613, and seven, three. How do you have babies that big and not know their twins anyway? Wow, save it for another day. But the ladies in the church, like took together a collection to buy her a dryer so she wouldn't have to hang. Flows on the line anymore, but those communities of faith really do help and kick in. And people have generous hearts and they care, and they notice that's one thing, is that they notice that there's a need here, and we come together. And if I can't help it by myself, I've got a bunch of other people in my community that I can gather together and we can make this happen.

 Nancy Boyer  10:23

Oh yes, that community of faith for me has just been when I was big with my twins, and I couldn't see my toes. My a woman from my congregation came and gave me a pedicure and put glitter on my toes. And so after the babies came, I had pretty toes, and that reminds me of Jesus washing feet, that it's like that story in the Bible where he washes his disciples feet and and I every time I read that, I think of that friend from my faith congregation who came and did that for me. So not only just help from above, but real, tangible help from people within the faith community is just makes life so great.

 DJ Stutz  11:05

Just absolutely it does. It's amazing now. So I'm curious. So you've got your kids, How then did you introduce the concepts of faith? When did you start? What led you and your husband? Did you have those conversations? How are we going to do this?

 Nancy Boyer  11:22

We did, in fact, when I was pregnant with my first baby, and having gone through what we had gone through with the deaths of our parents, and just knowing how crucial that link to God was for us, we just talked about it, even when I was pregnant with my first, that just every night, we would have a ritual in our family where we would read Scripture and pray together. And sometimes that's the only thing that I feel like I've succeeded at through the day. Sometimes the house is a big old disaster, and kids are crazy and schedules are crazy, but that is the one that's the been really the glue for me as as a mom. Now it's my oldest. Is 20. Is we started when she was one day old? Well, I don't know I I can't even remember the day when I brought her home how I was anyway, but very soon so we read, even when she was just a baby together, we would just read a few verses of scripture and talk about it, and talk to God and ask for his blessings on our family and for other people, just in our faith community and family, and ask for their blessings and or ask for blessings to be on them and try to figure out the Lord's will of how we could help those around us. And so that has been a staple in our family. Like I said, maybe the only good thing I can I'm consistently done.

 DJ Stutz  12:50

Yeah, there are days like that. So one of the things I remember so my first and my second, so Candace is my oldest. Two years later, I have my son, Shiloh, and I can remember nursing Shiloh, and sometimes it just depend on what time of the day. There were times when we read Dr Seuss, Candice love Dr Seuss at two years old. But then there were other times that we just read out of Scripture, you know, and the stories of Jesus, and then some of the great stories of the Old Testament. And yeah, we talked about some of those things, and even it too, she enjoyed that. And she, I think she just liked time with mommy. Maybe, I don't know, but, you know, we would talk about things like Daniel and David and Eve and some of the great Goliath and all of those things, yeah. And she would sit and snuggled in, you know, and that was kind of our time together, where she didn't mind me nursing shy, because she was always part of it and there. And we made that, that connecting piece. So I think that there are times then during the day, that we are able to take just a couple moments, and it may not be like I'm focusing on a baby and then a child, a toddler, next to me, and yet that even could be a spiritual, sacred moment between us. It's surprising how often, if we're looking for those opportunities, how often we can find them. Yes,

 Nancy Boyer  14:16

Yes, and I just love that, that it's so true that throughout the day, sometimes just the conversations, maybe questions that the kids will ask, where it can bring spiritual things in and and there's just a feeling that they get that gives them strength. When we talk about, like you were saying those stories of Daniel or Esther, and when there's just in their lives, when they have had different obstacles to be able to go back to those stories and say, Okay, I can brave like Esther or Daniel,

 DJ Stutz  14:52

Yeah, well. And two, there's stories like Samuel was just, what, three or four years old when he was taken to the temple. And, yeah. How Even small children can contribute and can have that faith experience, and when you explain it to them in that way, yeah, and Samuel was just a little guy, just like you, right? And you can make those connections to our kids. Jesus is 12 years old. He had things figured out by then, and we don't know what he had been taught and what he had been told about who he was and what his origins were about. We don't know that, but we do know that by 12, he was off and running, you know, and doing the Lord's work, that there are opportunities for our kids, no matter what age they are, to feel the spirit and then act upon it.

 Nancy Boyer  15:40

And I sometimes think that those children are actually the best ones at it, because God just works through children, and they are so open to it. And sometimes just act into I feel like children do just act intuitively in those good ways, because they're just they're so good, they're just untainted by the world. And children are, I think, are our examples. Often in in that one thing we we wouldn't we memorize. Sometimes we'll, we'll memorize scriptures. And what I found is when we memorized it, when they were little, my my 17 year old memorized in Corinthians, where it talks about charity. He memorized that at about four, five, maybe five, and he still remembers it. A lot of things they memorize later they they don't remember, but those children just have memories and ability that, to me is astounding, and often will say things that will teach me sometimes, my gosh, then I teach them absolutely.

 DJ Stutz  16:45

How often have we learned eternal truths from the mouths of our little children? Yes,

 Nancy Boyer  16:51

Yes, and I think we can, we maybe should listen to them more. Is one of the things through the years that that I would tell myself just to stop and be quiet and just listen to what they have to say, because they Yeah, there is a connection of faith that children just naturally have, is what I've learned, think now, now I've got a bunch of teenagers, and, I mean, I do have one younger and I wish I would have listened to them all more when they were little.

 DJ Stutz  17:19

Yeah.  You know, you bring up a really good point, though. I'm so glad you said that. So one of my son in laws, and they have a couple kids, but he has a biking group. They and once a week they'll go out and do mountain biking after work, and he was going down the hill and doing whatever he doesn't the guys get talking. You know, guys do, women do? We dunk on different things, but they have their own thing. But he said it really hit him that one of the times, and they're varying like some of them have faith, some of them don't. They just have this connection in mountain biking. And one of the dads, one time they were heading down, and they're just kind of talking, and his kids had grown. His youngest was getting ready to graduate from high school. And one of the things that he said was, I wish I had listened to him more. And that was one of his little regrets, of just know it you're gonna have regrets till the day you die of things you did with your kids. That's just how it works. That's why we're imperfect heroes. But that really hit him, though, and so now Peter really does, because of that comment, spend a lot of time just listening to his kids, who are very different, very, very different from each other, but they get along not all the time. They're siblings. It's part of life. If they get along all the time, get them to a mental health professional. There's something going on, but he does. He sits and he just listens to them talk about their day, talk about what they're worried about, talk about their excitement and what they want to do, and they're getting ready for a trip. Well, what do you want to do, and what do you think it's going to be like, and all of those things. And then there's the spiritual moments too. Talk to me about Jesus, talk to me about our Father in heaven. What do you think? And I love having those conversations with my grandkids.

 Nancy Boyer  19:06

Oh yes, because I think sometimes, just by nature, they know they can feel, maybe sometimes more than than we do, where that that connection to Heaven is so strong with children, and what a blessing it is to have children in our lives to teach us.

 DJ Stutz  19:24

Yeah, you know, one year I've gone through the scriptures. I can't tell you how many times it's just an everyday part of me, and has been for years. One year I went through the Scriptures, looking at it as a parenting manual. That's what I was looking at it through. And there's some examples of really great parents. There are examples of some really bad parents, and there are good parents who had kids who were wayward, and there were bad parents who had kids who turned out stellar and great. And I remember just reading about that and trying to think, why, why did this work out? And how did that work out? It was very i. Eye opening for me to take on the scriptures for that year. It was a full year, and look at it with that focus. What does this mean to me as a mom? What does this mean to me as my kids get older and they make decisions that are hard for me to watch them make, and what's my responsibility? Then with that, what do I need to be teaching them when they're two and three and four years old, to give them some kind of a foundation. What are some of the things that you did to maybe help you understand that? I'm sure conversations with your husband were key.

 Nancy Boyer  20:33

Yes, just like you said, I feel like all the time using the scriptures to help me in motherhood. Sometimes I'll look back and think, Oh, I wish I would have done this or that different, and then I'll see a scripture like the other day I read a line that just said, as seemeth me, that the Lord does as seemeth him good, and that, yeah, maybe we made mistakes here or there, but he doesn't just punish us when we're just trying to do good. And that really helped me the other day of being like, but God, just wants to do good. He is good. His heart is good. And trying, as a mother, just knowing that, that I'm giving my life to these kids. And yeah, he make, I may make mistakes, but he'll make things work for their good. I Romans, 828, he'll just...

 DJ Stutz  21:22

I was just reading that today. You've gotta be kidding me. Yeah, I just read that one today.

 Nancy Boyer  21:27

That's such a good one. And what helps me too is that I think one thing that I've learned from faith and from the scriptures is my kids are going to make decisions that I don't want them to make, and they have, some of them have, and I know they they will, but that as I'm just trying, as a mom, to just do my best, and some days, my best is better than others, that regardless of the decisions that they make, if, if I've just got that connection to God, and I'm asking him To lead me and forgive me when I mess up. That's enough that that's going to be okay if they make some really bad decisions. It's okay because I've tried my best to teach them the best I could and the days I didn't. He forgives. He just helps us put one step in front of the other. And I just think parenting with God as my companion along with my husband. Just really I'm so grateful.

 DJ Stutz  22:24

Now I have a question. So with my faith and community, we have Junior Sunday School children's group, they do little activities and bringing that in, did you take advantage of any of that as you were raising your kids?

 Nancy Boyer  22:40

Yes, and I love it. Our faith community has activities a couple times a month for my boy that just turned nine, and all my other children too, when they were that age, and even now as teenagers, and having friends that have the same values or similar has really helped them in their decisions, and also me where things like social media and phones, those things have come up, and for them to have these friends whose parents have similar values in specifically those ways, because that's such A tricky part of this generation of technology being used for good or evil, and that has been just one real blessing from my kids having that faith community. Is those values and other parents who we can bond together and say, Okay, let's, let's not have them on Instagram until they're 17. And that now I'm not saying that should be everybody's rule aid that is so specific to different parents.

 DJ Stutz  23:47

But that's the rule you chose for your family, for us, and you had the support of the parents of some of their friends, it sounds like.

 Nancy Boyer  23:54

Yeah, and that has been and the things that they wear, the the clothes, the rules in our house for how we want them to dress and to present themselves, of having other kids who have the same rules as us, so they're not just singled out of my parents make us do this and then they feel forced. Rather, they feel like, okay, my friends have similar rules, and this is why, and that's been very helpful to have that support.

 DJ Stutz  24:21

Yeah, that common attitude with the peer groups and that peer pressure. Peer pressure can be a good thing. It can always a bad thing. It just depends on who the peer is.

 Nancy Boyer  24:31

So true,

 DJ Stutz  24:33

Yeah, I love, so you know, my little teeny, teeny community and our downtown Chester consists of a park with a pavilion, and then we have a post office that is open Monday through Friday, from nine in the morning to noon. That's our downtown.

 Nancy Boyer  24:51

Oh, it's different than ours.

 DJ Stutz  24:54

No grocery store, no gas station. The kids go to the next towns to go to. School, all of that. But what I love is that the people who were working with the little kid are getting together and teaching, even like the kids as young as four years old, about service. And so this next month, actually, they are building planner boxes for our little park. And so the older kids are helping with the building. And we've got these dads that are involved, and they're getting it all set up, you know, like dads do. And then later in the day, after the boxes are filled, we've got the younger kids coming in to help us plant flowers in these boxes. And so it's beautifying our park. But not only that, the plan is in the town just a little north of us. I mean, it takes me 13 minutes to drive there. It's not really far, but there's a retirement home, a senior living area, and so their plan is to plant flowers that are cut, and then the kids want to take these to the seniors in there and have a day of just spending time with them. So I love that this group of parents just got together and said, Here's the plan, and this is what we want to do. And how are we going to make this happen? And how are we going to include kids that are older, eight and older they're old enough to be able to put something like that together. And how do we include the younger kids and make them feel like they're a part of things, but realizing that they are capable of serving others, serving our community, serving these older people, and maybe they'll even have enough to send maybe some widows or whatever, they'll decide when the flowers grow and we see how much we have. But you know, when you give your kids those kinds of opportunities, and when you talked about the faith community, and maybe some of those parents of friends of your kids are not part of the same faith as you, but they're part of your kids group, and they can help out with their ideas and get in, whether it's your kids softball team or football team or whatever, How can we serve one another, which is really the Second Great Commandment, isn't it? And then get our kids involved to notice I am capable, and what can I do to help?

 Nancy Boyer  27:11

Yes, that is so cool. What your community is doing. I love that. But speaking of ours today, our children in our faith community and our teenagers too. They've been doing something really simple, but here in Las Vegas, we have a Ronald McDonald House that's super important, yeah, so they've been collecting those tops of soda cans, and that goes in and they they turn them in and and it's to put money towards the Ronald McDonald House. And they're cleaning a park tonight together all the the chills so that, Oh, I'm so glad you said that, because I agree that has been one of the best parts of working together in making the world a better place.

 DJ Stutz  27:53

Yeah, yeah, absolutely. Because if we don't teach it, we're falling apart. Guys like and teaching them to serve and to notice and to realize that they have the ability. If we can give our kids the ability to serve and work with other people whom we may not be on the same plate, religiously or politically or socially or economically or whatever. You know what I'm saying. But if we can look at others around us, and instead of saying, Well, this is our group, and you're not part of our group, or worse, this is our group, but you're not that, so we get to hate you, which is the example the adults are setting around our kids. And so we really the kids are the ones who are going to save us all and to help this country, to help this world, communities all over, to reach out and to see that there's compassion. And Christ did not ask them where they went to church. He said, just said, Come follow me. All ye who are heavy laden if you have a problem, come on, let's try and work it out together. Come follow me. He didn't say you and you, but you, not you and not you. If you were willing to drop what you were doing, quit fishing and come. He was there for you. And I think that our kids just have that love of they're so fresh.

 Nancy Boyer  29:20

Yeah. I think kids naturally just love Jesus and give him their hearts. And if we can just follow those little kiddos by also giving our hearts,

 DJ Stutz  29:32

Yeah, in fact, I'll tell you so. And people who've been listening for a while, they'll know this about me, but two days a week, I go to the elementary in the little town north of us. And I mean, there's only 250 kids in the whole school, and we have some kids who have some emotional and social behavior issues. They can be little violent here and there, but there's a little guy that I work with most of the time. He's in second grade, and, oh. Oh, you know, sometimes he's gotten better. We haven't thrown chairs, we haven't kicked over tables in months now, so we're making some big improvements. But there are times when he'll just walk out of the room like you can't manage it, and he'll actually go and hide. So there are these benches under the hooks where they hang up their backpacks out in the hallway, and he'll go and hide under a bench. And sometimes I'm like, do you want me to put a coat here so no one can see you? Because he just, he doesn't want people to see him. He know he's struggling. And then he'll come out, and a couple of times. Now he's done this twice, he's done this. I'm like, How are you doing, buddy? Are you getting better? And he said, Yes, I just prayed to Jesus and asked him to help me all in the zone, you know. Oh, my heart, you know. And so even though, as hard as he has a good family and his brains wired just a little differently, and so he's got a lot of challenges, but that was his thing, his go to when he was having such a hard time, I prayed to Jesus and asked him to help me. And you know, so even kids who you would think, I mean, if you saw him, and when he can throw some language, just let me tell you, so you know it's not FCC acceptable or whatever it is. But even kids who are on that and another person who doesn't know him might see this meltdown and think we're going to judge away, aren't we? Well, his family, well, he's this and that, and it's just a little child of God trying his best with what he has, with what's going on. And even those kids are reaching out in faith, in the faith that they have, and understanding that Jesus loves me even when, okay, I'm going to start even when I'm having my hardest times.

 Nancy Boyer  31:51

And maybe even especially when I'm having my hardest times, it's when he's especially near. And I just love that that little boy has felt it and knew it and he knew what to do,

 DJ Stutz  32:01

Yeah, yeah. And he doesn't do it every time, like I said. He's only done it twice, but still it's there. It's there. 

 Nancy Boyer  32:08

And knows that power.  He knows I feel like that. He hit it, that little boy, he just hit exactly what it's all about, didn't he that we can pray to the Lord who will give us strength in whatever we're facing right then that he what a, let what a what a beautiful experience to hear him say that. Because I think that's just the crux of everything. The word doesn't always change our circumstance, but he can give us strength. And I feel like that is just in being a mother of all the different stages. That's just it. There are very few times when the circumstances changed, but like that boy, that sweet boy that asking the Lord just to help me and give me strength to do what it takes.

 DJ Stutz  32:58

Yeah, that's what it felt at times. I know as a mother, and I'm assuming you as well. Have we had to go into another just another room? Might I hide? I would hide in the closet. Yep, just sit down. Well, because the clothes are nice muffling or the noise and they're out trying to kill each other, and I can't even I would go in the closet and just give me strength. Just give me strength. Help me to get through the next 10 minutes, you know, help me to know what to do. To help these children that you've given me, and they're falling apart and they're hating each other right now and then. And my kids, I mean, whoo, they had their times, right? They all do. They all do. But, you know, they all get along now, and it's kind of fun that I've got kids who are all over the place where some have stayed faithful, some have gone to other faiths. Some are different political Ooh, boy, we've got the polarization there on politics. But what I love about it is that they haven't let that get in the way of their relationships with their siblings. So we all still get together. July. Everyone's coming. We're all gonna have some fun times together, and it's even as diverse and opinionated far be my children from having an opinion, and Heaven's help me, I raise them to be independent and to do things on their own and to ask their own questions, and all of those things, and some of them have come up with just different answers. But that doesn't get in the way of family ever.

 Nancy Boyer  34:38

I just love that, that your family has stayed strong like that. And one thing I've just for sure found out is that God knows each of those kids better than I do, and so when I'm just praying and pleading for one of them, he's, it's I will get that feeling of I've got it, it's okay if they're making this choice that's different than you want them to, because I love. Them. God's saying to me that, like I love them more than than you do, which feels impossible, but it's true that he's got them and he knows them and and I love how you have just helped with that. I love that that I'm hoping that I'm like that in a few years, that no matter what my children's relationships with each other will be, will be strong, because that's that's so beautiful.

 DJ Stutz  35:23

Yeah, it's so important. Well, Nancy, we're running out of time, but thank you so much for coming and, you know, doing our finale for the season and being there. I just so appreciate it. Thank you for your insight. Thank you with a sick kiddo, and I know you've got other things that you're doing with your kids this evening later on, and you still took the time to come and bless us with your faith and with your thoughts, and I just really appreciate that. Now I know that you're a budding author. You've got some early starts on Amazon, but we can let people know about that, and just the ideas that you've been sharing with me about what you want to do with your works and your writing, I'm really looking forward to seeing what you come up with.

 Nancy Boyer  36:11

Oh, that's so sweet of you. Thank you. I do have an Easter book. I wanted to elevate Easter with my family, and so it's, it's called, it's a really long title. I'm like, Christ centered Easter celebration activities and faith anyway, faith filled activities. But if you just Nancy Griffin Boyer on Amazon, and then I just have a bunch of journal I as I'm self publishing, so I'm just trying. It's just one of my bucket list things I want to do. And, yeah, there's journals, and I'm big on journaling. That is another thing I do feel like is the journaling that's been huge for me. So I am working on producing some prompted journals. And anyways, yeah, but I'm wedding, not professional in any way.

 DJ Stutz  36:58

Well, we love those authors. Just as an ending note with the journaling. So my daughter, my oldest daughter, did a lot of journaling when she, you know, diary writing, dear diary stuff. Yeah, the teenage stuff, you know, junior high and high school. And her two youngest daughters. She's got five kids as well, but her two youngest daughters came across those and they have had a blast reading of their mama. She hated this teacher, and this boy is cute. My friend did this, and you know, all those things, and it made their lives more relatable to their mom. So I would highly encourage helping your children to journal, because it's going to help them when they become parents. And yes, and yes, the kids,

 Nancy Boyer  37:42

Yes, journaling and so many that could be a whole thing on its own. The journaling, because it helps in so many ways. So, ah!

 DJ Stutz  37:50

Well, before we go Nancy and I have to admit, I forgot to warn you about this, I always ask my guests the same question at the end, yes. So we know that there are no perfect parents. Never have been, never will be, but some parents do seem more successful than others. How would you describe maybe just a successful parent,

 Nancy Boyer  38:13

One that keeps trying, I think, one that just loves their children, and they just one foot in front of the other, like I've worked with mothers who've been very close or have had their their children taken away, and so at times, yeah, they maybe were looked at as failing, but as they tried, even in those situations, to just put one foot in front of the other and love just, just choose to love those kids no matter what, and keep going.

 DJ Stutz  38:46

I love the grace and the mercy that you extend to those parents who are struggling. It doesn't mean they're not heroes. It means that they have their own stories and their own things to work out.

 Nancy Boyer  38:57

Yeah, we all come from such different places, and some people have struggled in ways I I can never even imagine. And so there is we, just, I think, grace for ourselves, grace for others. Just keep, keeping going, keeping on, keeping on.

 DJ Stutz  39:17

And isn't that what our Eternal Father does for us? Yes,

 Nancy Boyer  39:21

He does. He has that grace. We may have bad days, bad years, but it doesn't matter, because we can today's like Anne of Green Gables. Let's see. Tomorrow is a new day with no mistakes in it, and we just can keep going on to that because God is so forgiving. He is so forgiving, and wants us to succeed. I know that, and he wants us to his parents, because they're his kids too. 

 DJ Stutz  39:47

So absolutely Nancy. Thank you so much for joining us and spending this time with us. I really appreciate it. And so for everyone, if you loved what you heard today, please. Give us a rating and a review. Five stars is the appropriate number of stars, and I would love to hear about maybe some ideas you have for the next season. What are some topics that you are interested in us exploring? I have all kinds of connections with different specialists, and I love just talking to everyday, imperfect heroes like Nancy and sharing our stories. So everyone, thank you so much for 201 episodes, and we will see you in August. So till then, let's find joy in parenting. See ya.  Thank you so much for sticking around to the end of today's episode of imperfect heroes, parenting is truly one of the most rewarding journeys we can take. But let's face it, it can be incredibly challenging, and sometimes we make it harder on ourselves than it needs to be. The good news is that with a little bit of work up front, there are practical steps you can take to bring more peace and joy into your family life. I am passionate to share these strategies and insights with you. If you're ready to step on the path to joyful, effective parenting, I invite you to schedule a family checkup. Just click on the calendar link in the show notes below. Schedule a time that works perfectly for you, and let's work together to create a more harmonious and happy environment, and remember, every small step that you take today makes a big difference. So thank you again for joining us, and until next time, let's find joy in parenting.